Existential Piñata Party

This recipe was co-created with my beloveds when one of us texted the group chat with "help. I'm feeling the existential dread". This recipe was our response and it's one we now all know we can ask for if we're feeling particularly burdened by the realities of living under late stage capitalism and a climate crisis. It doesn't solve the underlying issues, but it does make one feel less alone and more able to fight another day and get creative.

Serves: 5-10 people who need to release stress and find a way to laugh and hold hands in the face of existential dread.

Time: 2-4 hours

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Ingredients

For the piñata

• piñata -- check out your local Mexican neighborhood to shop local

• stick (or something to hit the piñata with) -- this is most commonly overlooked

• place to hang the piñata with enough space to whack it. Parks or backyards are best

• blanket to put under the piñata to catch all your treats

• blindfold for the whackers

• piñata treats that are both calming, playful, and sweet

  • candy, sweets, tiny bottles of spirits

  • bath bombs and salts

  • chapstick, travel size ibuprofen

  • notes that you write each other: jokes, love letters, words of affirmation

  • googly eyes, bubbles, silly things that will make you and your friends smile

For the ritual

• index cards or stick notes

• pens/markets for all

• guiding reflection questions (listed below, but please choose what works best for your group)

How To

Preparation

1. Invite folks over for an afternoon of releasing and commiserating with the aim of finding laughter and support in each other

2. Stuff your piñata -- recommend one person does it to increase the surprise and delight of the others

3. Write up your reflection questions somewhere that all can see

Reflection Questions

• What makes you feel joyful or alive?

• What are you most afraid of?

• What are some experiments you want to try?

• What is your first step in brining you back to yourself?

Reflection

1. Start with 20 minutes of quiet, individual reflection time. Provide pens and paper and a comfortable environment for folks to write and reflect in whatever way works best for them

2. Invite folks to share when they are ready. This may take time and there may be silences and pauses--that doesn't make it awkward

3. Let the space and the conversation unfold. Listen to each other. Get comfortable asking, "do you want to problem solve right now or vent?"

4. When folks have shared and released and are ready to move into the joy (and the therapeutic whacking) -- transition to the piñata space

Piñata time

1. Hoist the piñata and set up the space together

2. Blindfold the first whacker and spin them around 3-5 times. Let the group be a comforting guide in leading the whacker to the piñata position

3. Ask the whacker what they want to release (let them say it loudly! from the gut!)

4. WHACK IT and take turns. Laugh generously

5. Share in the treats together. Take pictures. Remember that what makes stumbling blindfolded into the world possible is the guidance of our friends and sweetness of being together

Substitutions

1. Surprise (joyful) party! Surprise your friends with more piñatas at already existing parties. Add in more affirmations and sweet notes and treats specifically for your friend's birthday.

2. Grief/Angst party Most parties are thrown for people who are in good moods--but people who are hurting/lonely/disappointed may benefit from the community the most. If you have a friend going through a hard time, offer a ritual of whacking the shit out of something that can take it and hold space for their grief. Fill the piñata with notes of anger or grief AND candy. Be with your friend in their feelings -- the piñata isn't to cheer them up exactly (although it may) but to let them be less alone with their hard feelings.